December 11,2004                                                                   Song: Torete Mood: Fine

My Boo,

I've got to tell you so many stuff. I think since I have not updated you many special things have happened and I'm super dumb not to type it down. So on the 8th of December I think, Francis and I were really loosing it. I don't know what is happening to me but it seems like the longer we are together the uneasy feeling is getting worse. And so I can't talk to him and he wanted to talk about. Well ok I'm the bad one here, but all I want is a nice conversation not a serious one where we talk about some complicated stuff that makes our relationship ugly. And I wasn't talking and stuff I was just silent and really out of mind, he was like please talk to me Nadz... After that he sat on the other chair away from me. I was super hurt, I cried. I knew that day we were going to break up... We were dismissed for lunch he immediately got up and didn't accompanied me in riding home, which he always does. I ate lunch fast and did my stuff fast so I can go to school early. I saw Jojet in the store next to our campus I told him Francis was mad at me. He explained stuff and advice and I said I wanted to go to his house. On our way we met Francis and Jammie. I went closer to Francis, but the words were not coming out of my mouth. I looked at him and opened my mouth and nothing came out. We walked together but no one spoke. Then we stayed in the store for like 10 minutes I knew he was waiting for me to apologize and I was gonna do it, but somehow it won't come out. Pretty dumb moment, I was like Francis... Uhhh nothing nothing. We went up and I reported in our World History. We ignored each other but on our last subject he apologized and I said I was the one who's suppose to say that. And I knew he was mad. He admitted he was going to say we need time and space, I was surprised he didn't though. And super glad and happy he didn't. I'm happy he had a very open mind about it. But for my side I had lot of times where I didn't think shallow and had an open mind too. Anyway after that they went to our house to burrow our microphone for our project in Speech and Theater. Next day, 9 was like magic, the uneasy feeling was gone and I was comfortable... And I was super glad. That afternoon we had practice for our Physical Education Project, Erwin was my partner we were assigned to dance the Tango. I knew Erwin was taking advantage but I wasn't speaking, instead of holding my waist he was holding my ass. And was holding my hands really tight, I knew he still has feelings for me. But I was just ignoring his obvious moves and was trying to make a friendly conversation. That night I lost BIG money P1000!!! I was crying and all and I wanted to be comforted so I went to Francis house with Bhelle and her best friend. His grandpa said he was in Alex's practicing, I went there alone Bhelle and her best friend went the opposite way. There was this man riding a bicycle following us but I had no idea who he was or if he was really following us all I know is his just “accidentally” had the same direction with us. And I had no idea he was still following me in going to Alex's house. Suddenly he attacked from my back and squeezed my breast... I was again super shocked. God, this is the second time that this has happened to me... God... First time was my previous school this man with cigarette... never mind! So I went to Alex's house and they were practicing their dance was Swing. I was wearing a cap and they were guessing if it was Nads. Because I was hiding my face, they were fighting that it wasn't me and some would say it was me. When I look up they said I told you so! And then Francis went near me and I told him I lost my money and there was a little commotion. After that we talked a little and they continued practicing sometimes Francis would come near me and Jammie would be mad because their practicing was interrupted by me but she wasn't really saying it directly. She's acting like that for the past few days. And I hate it! She would be mad whenever Francis and I would be sweet and she will complain why aren't they going home yet. And she'll sit and had this frown and Francis would say Awww! Best friend is mad already. And Jammie was like I don't know to you! Oh I hate her. And then I forced Rainier that we'd go to Jayson's house. Oh yeah Jayson and I are getting along pretty well and I knew his the master of TRIP or you know fooling someone. So we went there but he denied and said he wouldn't joke me for that big amount. We went back and I had fun riding with him, and I had some scratch in my legs for he dared me if I can take not stopping in humps. Anyway after their practice Francis and I were really sweet and he would wrap his arms around me and we didn't stop holding our hands. Anyway he accompanied me in riding home. Next day we were sweeter than ever. And so the days after, he even embraced me when we were reminded of drinking he said he wouldn't drink just when there's occasions. I got mad at him just the last day for always talking and caring about Jammie. Because all of us girls were mad at her, and we're like all against her. We were treating her badly, so she cried and was emotional and I understood Francis was her best friend but I think it was a little “over” coz after we had our practice again we went to his house but he wasn't there, then we went to Tom's house their practice place that day they weren't there anymore and then we went back to his house. I was with Christian all the time. I think I'm getting closer with all the boys, Tom *another best friend*, Christian *one really close friend, he would often make Francis jealous by wrapping his arms around me and he would pinch my cheeks gently and take note his really HOT, cute hearthrob!*, Jun2 *my newest and best ever friend*, Jayson *my jokey and KA-KULITAN*, Jojet *advicer and KATRIPAN, Angelo *has crush on me, and is really nice*, Kerly *getting along nicely* , John Mark *he helped me in wearing my gloves, and we always tease each other and we always play this EYE GAME*, Erwin *past suitor, dance mate*, Robin *past suitor always tease and phrases me but I think his the one who stole my money*, and Martin *YAY! We're alright and are now good friends just like before. His my partner in our Tango dance and I think his pretty in-love with me well that what Jun2 always tells me and I think his being obvious like last night he didn't want to go home just yet because he said his still having fun. I was singing and he was playing the guitar and we both loves Officially Missing You and he likes playing Hwag na Hwag Mong Sasabihin oh yeah I got the highest score in music for singing that song YAY and they loved it and he would look at me really sweetly and I would cover my face* Anyway so there back to Francis Jammie and me getting jealous part the next day I was still kind of a little mad at him and he was saying sorry but after we presented our dance we were sweet. And we even played this Spin the bottle where I got dared to hug RJ! And to be kissed my Francis not bad at all. After class Francis wanted me to come with his in the mall, and I had fun I wore a blue top and a blue pants and a pretty body bag with 2 blue badges. We were super sweet. We had fun watching Martin and some pretty good guys dance in the Para Para Paradise. They sang in the videoke and they were forcing me to sing but I didn't. Oh yeah I was the only girl in the group Francis, Christian, Kerly, Martin, Jun2 and Monsieur Renato was with us. We window shopped and I saw some pretty Chuck Taylor and nice caps and I had fun just watching them play in the Time Zone. Francis wrapped his arms around my waist and belly and was kissing and smelling my hair and Christian and the other guys were teasing us that ants are all over. We head back home and Francis walked me home, after that I ate and Jun2, Martin and Kerly went back and Lovely talked to Jun2 while we sang after they talked he joined in our singing madness and they went home at about 9 PM. And now I'm super sleepy. Hugs&Kisses*Nadz